Parodies Lost logo

Tuesday 26 April 2011

The Walrus and The Carpenter

The Walrus and The Carpenter
Were governing the land:
They fought like anything because
Things weren’t going as planned:
‘If only we could see as one,’
They said, ‘it would be grand!’

‘Should the referendum say that
First Past The Post wins clear,
Could you please drop the AV thing?’
Asked The Walrus with a leer.
‘I doubt it,’ said the Carpenter
And shed a bitter tear.

‘O Voters, come and back my cause!’
The Carpenter implored.
‘Let’s change these bally voting laws,
I’m sick of being ignored!
This coalition is a sham:
As doormat I am floored.’

The Wily Walrus looked at him:
His eyes were button small.
‘You’ve me to thank for being here
Your mandate is f**k all.
We like the voting status quo
So kindly, please, play ball.’

The Number One in Number Ten
Is what voting’s about.
The Carpenter was deeply miffed,
How could he get him out,
This party-pooping one in charge,
This Walrus big and stout?

Alas dear reader, there’s no end
To tale of love and hate,
For when you enter partnership
Be quite sure you don’t date
The one who claims to share your dreams
But won’t share from his plate.